Angry Pimp

I am the Ubuntu Pimp. I have pimped Ubuntu and pimped myself to so many of the female gender it's not even funny. Usually I'm a pretty calm guy unless I'm partying hard then I can be as wild as you can imagine, if not more. Really I'm a nice guy and I will tell you the truth. Rarely am I really so angry I really have to control myself from having an outburst of Rage... unless I'm driving, then it happens often. Don't judge me about my road rage though. I would like to see you come over here and drive one of the worlds worst highways here in Chicago.

Anyway I'm not belligerently mad at the moment. I'm just really frustrated with the Ubuntu world right now. I'm seeing so many other Linux distros getting notoriety. I think it's good Linux is being noticed but Ubuntu needs more. There are just a few things it has been noticed for. That's fine. Many people in the Ubuntu world seem to make it seem like Ubuntu is the best known distro. I'm sorry it really isn't. Now I love the the guys at www.ubuntuforums.org, because they are really helpful people when you need help. You can get a lot of interesting discussion with them too. The problem is they think Ubuntu is doing great out there.

I'm here to say it's not doing as great as everyone wants to say. First I want to say what it's doing great in. First and foremost it is doing great with it's desktop. I don't think there is another distro that is doing as good. Another thing it is doing great with is the fact that many people are converting over to Ubuntu all the time. Another thing is the support from the community. Really, us Ubuntu people are really nice people.

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Now let me tell you what it's not doing great in. It's not doing great in getting the word out to Dell or other companies that it's ready for the world to use it. Why is that? Have people been lazy? I think ever since Dapper came out almost a year ago, I'd have been all over the place pounding it down people's throats that Ubuntu can hang with Redhat and Suse. I don't think it can beat them yet, but I do think it can hang with them without problem. Everything I have seen with Ubuntu says so. Everything I have used with Ubuntu says so.

You say we can't get deals with these companies. I say don't tell me that. Don't think so closed minded. There are many countries in this world where Microsoft has no deals with, and these companies can put Ubuntu on these computers for the other countries. South American is a great place to look into for this. Let's not forget all of Asia.

So now I'm totally angry about this. Ubuntu is ripe for the picking. Hey Mark Shuttleworth, why haven't things rolled along like they should? You give me the number for those people who I'd need to talk for this, and you'll see why I'm called the pimp. You'll see me convince even Sony to put Ubuntu on their computers. I don't care if Sony has some contract with Windows or not. They will break the contract just because I'm the Ubuntu Pimp. Seriously I will beat those idiots senseless if they don't follow what I say. I ain't no punk, I did grow up in the ghetto. My highschool was like the kind you see on TV where people bring guns and knives to school. Drugs were sold in the hallways, bathrooms, and classrooms. No kidding, in my Wood Shop class I seen people buy drugs from a guy everyday.

Anyway, give me a chance at these idiots, I don't want some stupid email conversation or phone conversation with them. I want face to face so that way they can't blow me off. They have to see me, they have to feel my presence there. Yes people I am this angry, I am this full of fire. I'm ready to destroy anyone who is in my way. I'd like to see the Microsoft guys say something too.

Hey in fact I'll offer this challenge to them. If any of you Microsoft guys have a problem with me wanting to push Ubuntu that hard and have a world where Linux is just as much of a contender in the IT world or more, then come fight me. No rules, except no weapons and the fight has to be one on one. It will be out in the street and basically anything goes. I swear you wont walk away being able to see. I will rip your eyes out and throw them in the Chicago river for the fish!

Anyway, just to calm down a bit. I really want Ubuntu to be pushed harder. I really want the world to see what it can do, not just Linux but Ubuntu in specific. Let the world pick SuSe, Gentoo, or something after it's tried Ubuntu. The thing is I just want people to see Ubuntu and try it. Now, I'm going to go make dinner and calm down.

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Angry Pimp